My College Friends

As I got into the office today, I read T's post about his family at Rutgers. Although this blog is about a strong group of friends, we all have friend outside of this group. When I'm home in New Jersey, I spend nearly all of my free time hanging out with the same people (which is great), but I'm not always home. In fact, I went to college in North Carolina for four years, so I had to develop strong friendships there too. Now that college is over (at least undergraduate), I won't have many opportunities to see people who were such a big part of my life. Fortunately, I had the chance this weekend to visit my old university and see many of the people I'll miss the most next year (in addition to the people you already know...) when I move to Chicago for grad school. Following up on T's idea, I am in the mood to describe a few of these people and why they've meant so much to me.

Carlo: My buddy Carlo is a native of Paris, France and is one of the most genuine people I have ever met. Since his father is American and his mother French, Carlo is a clever combination of European flair, American awkwardness, and slapstick comedy. All the pieces come together to make a exceedingly funny, self-deprecating French guest. Carlo is also one of the best people I've ever met. He values the same things I do when it comes to treating people with courtesy and kindness, and he is as loyal a person as I've ever met. Although he joined my fraternity half way through my 2 years as president, he did as much for our organization as anybody. I told him when I saw him this weekend that he is now the heart of the fraternity, and I would never say that lightly. He also happens to be quite brilliant (this may be a common theme for awhile), hoping to get his PHD in electrical engineering (which is what he studies in college). I wish I had know him for a longer time him in college, but I was lucky enough just to know him at all.

Tommy: I believe that everybody here has met Tommy, a smallish Asian kid who is going to be the best doctor in the history of the world. Although he can be a little quiet, I think anybody who has met him would talk about how wonderful a kid he is. I call him a kid all the time. I'll tell people, "Tommy is such a good kid." It's true, he really is. I have always viewed him as a younger cousin of sorts. Although he works exceedingly hard (he is an engineer and pre-med), he tries his best to hang out when he can. One of the benefits of seeing Tommy occasionally is that I've always appreciated when he is around. He is one of those brilliant (I mean genius-brilliant) Asian kids who also has great social skills. Seriously, everybody loves Tommy. I'm glad he's been one of my college friends who has been able to visit me in New Jersey and meet my friends here.

Miles: The guys here in New Jersey have also met Miles, and they definitely learned that he is a character. He instigates, starts arguments, and was generally a source of conflict in my fraternity; however, he also became of my greatest friends. He did a lot to help me get through some really frustrating times. He and I would go back-and-forth mocking each other, something I always enjoyed in the incredible amount of time I spent with him in the last 1.5 years. His constant ribbing helped me develop a much thicker skin as well as quickened by whit (I had to be on my toes with him). Being friends with Miles also gave me the opportunity to become close with his family. I am proud to be a frequent guess of his mom, dad and brother. Although Miles could often be very frustrating, I am grateful that I am so close to him and his family.

Andrew: Andrew was the gay guy of our fraternity and my first close gay friend. He must have the thickest skin of any gay guy in the world. He is so comfortable with his sexuality that we could endlessly mess with him, and he was always okay with it. In return, I was on the receiving end of all sorts of Jew jokes (like I haven't heard them all). Andrew is best friends with Fed, and the two of them made it an outrageous combination. No description of either of them could be complete without referencing the long list of adventures and stories the two of them had together. Some of their stories are rather disturbing; others are absolutely ridiculous. Andrew is also a resident of New Jersey. Unfortunately, he is from south Jersey (near Philly).

Fed: Most of the stories that I will be unable to tell my kids until they are very old star this kid named Fed. I have told of few of his adventures to the guys (the especially crazy ones). Fed was the vice president of our fraternity in my last year. Although I got a lot of credit for my efforts, Fed was the guy doing most of the dirty work. He never got enough credit for how much effort he put into our chapter. He cared more than anybody else (even more than me). He always put the chapter before himself, even when he didn't get the respect that he deserved. Fed lived right across the hall from me this past year, so I spent a ton of time with him. He saw me at my best and at my worst, and he was always very patient with me. I didn't always make it easy for him. I would sometimes take out my frustrations on him. Although it never got too out of hand, I wish I had always been as good to him as he was to me. He would endlessly frustrate me with his stupid decision making when it came to girls and life. I give him advice, and it seemed like he would ignore it. However, Fed was a great friend, and despite his faults (of which he had a few), he is still a great guy. Fed was one of the guys who stopped by my room as much as he could (which was a l0t): something I always appreciated.

Wade: Wade was my roommate for 3 years. We have a seemingly endless list of memories living together. We started out not knowing each other very well, but by the time I graduated, he knew me as well as anybody. I probably don't have to explain how important a person becomes to you when you live with him by choice for 3 years. He was with me for every step of the way with my fraternity. I bounced ideas of him, worked out problems... He visited Ireland with my family and me. We played basketball together, watched TV together, yelled at the TV together, ate meals together... the list could go on forever. Wade and I hung out pretty much everyday for 3 years. I'll miss that.

Corinne: There was no chance Corinne was not going to be the last person on my list of important people. No chance at all. My visit to North Carolina was really to visit her. She is my best friend and also my adopted sister. I would do anything for her. I met her freshmen year as a girlfriend of one of the brothers in the fraternity that I would eventually join. Our friendship had a distinct linear progression (although miss math genius may disagree). At first she was a brother's girlfriend. Then for a while she was part of pair called "Zach and Corinne." I hadn't met either of them until after they were already together, so as far as I knew, they had been dating since the beginning of the universe. Their relationship meant a lot to me and was probably one of the reasons that I became so close to her. We became extremely close our last two years of college. She has visited me in New Jersey multiple times. I have visited her in Chicago. We have vacationed to Texas together.

Corinne is so important that she deserves a 2nd paragraph. She is one of the people whom I talk to everyday (I wish it was actually everyday). She has a new boyfriend now, which has definitely been an adjustment for me (I have been so-so at handling it). The hardest part of it has been that I'm so happy that she's happy, but the source of her happiness is competition for her time. Unfortunately, I'm always going to lose that competition. In late April, I found out I would be going to grad school in Chicago at the same school that her new boyfriend would be starting grad school. At first it was just awesome that I would see her whenever she visited Chicago to see him. I guess that wasn't enough for me, because now her boyfriend and I are living together* (yeah it's dumb I know). Since I'm still riding the high of seeing her so much this weekend, I am especially happy to know that I will get to see her often (even if it is not as frequently as I would like).

*I really like her boyfriend. If I have to lose the battle for her time, I happy to lose it to him. I have very high standards for her boyfriend, and he definitely meets them. Although he isn't perfect yet, living with me, I'll make sure he gets there. I am really excited to move to Chicago, and he is a major part of that. *

No description of Corinne can be finished with explaining how unfairly brilliant she is. She is going to Stanford to get her PHD in electrical engineering. She won nearly every national award for undergraduate engineering and had her pick of grad schools to attend. Understandably, she chose Stanford. She is likely the smartest person I've ever met.

These are people who are important to me. There are plenty more. These are just the ones I saw this weekend. Maybe you'll meet more of them in the future.

D

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