0
Dear B, APRIL FOOLS. Love from, God...
Posted by The one and only "B"...
on
7:23 PM
Hello blog readers,
B here, with another story of my misfortunes. Maybe not misfortunes, just a pain in my ass really. You see, whenever I make plans, even if they are well thought out and I've had time to schedule everything, something always goes wrong. I don't mean little things either. I mean, here's my plan and now it's ruined, kind of wrong. For example, which is really the whole point of this tirade on my luck, this weekend I was supposed to go to Maine with Char and see a concert. God couldn't let me have one weekend outside of Jersey though...
The plan was that after I got out of my 8 A.M. class, I would go pick up my paycheck, get my oil changed and tires rotated, then make the drive up to Massachusetts. Char goes to school up there, so I was going to meet him and his awesome roommate, and drive up with them to Maine. Anticipating the long day ahead of me, I went to bed around ten last night... I then proceeded to wake up at five this morning. That was not part of the plan. Seven o'clock would have been an acceptable time, but five? My family of early birds aren't even up at five. Needless to say, I was a little annoyed, so I plugged in my headphones and attempted to sleep for a little longer. Only to wake up again at six. At some point during my hour of restless sleep, my headphones had fallen out of my ears, and some obnoxious freakin bird was practically screaming outside my window. I personally hate the sound of birds in the morning. What is so damn important that they feel the need to chirp loud enough for everyone to hear at six in the morning? Seriously? Can't that wait until ten or something when I've had a cup of coffee? I don't normal condone violence against innocent animals, but this bird was lucky I couldn't get my window open. I was about ready to go Xena: The Warrior Princess on it's ass with my slingshot... Yes, I own a slingshot... I like shooting grapes at people, don't you judge me. Actually, this time I wouldn't really blame you if you did judge me. I'm pretty sure my industrial sized slingshot isn't legal in the state of New Jersey. I guess we can add that to the list of things I own or do that is illegal, and I just don't care.
Anyway, I went back to sleep for an hour, then got up and got ready for class. I should mention real quick that I live with my two grandparents and my Aunt, because otherwise this next part of the story might not make any sense. As I was walking out of my house, I said a quick goodbye to my Aunt and Grandma, telling them that if I didn't see them after class, I would see them when I came home on Sunday. My Grandma briefly mentioned the northeast having a little bit of snow, so I responded saying I would check with Char and see how the roads are...
Two hours later, I'm sitting in my public speaking class, and my phone starts blowing up. Not literally blowing up, that would be horrible. I just mean that I received a lot of texts all at once.... God help me for teaching my Grandmother how to text... I got a four page long text about how the damn Weather Channel was reporting a "MASSIVE" snowstorm in the northeast last night... So I texted Char's roommate and asked her what the weather status was. Her response, "It snowed two inches and was done." Here's the thing about having an Italian Grandmother though, once she's decided it's not safe, there's no arguing with her. Trust me, I've tried previously and have failed. Every. Freaking. Time. You would think I would win just ONCE. Nope, not a chance. I respect my Grandmother though, she's always been there for me, especially when I've needed it most. So when it comes down to it, I'll do whatever will make her happy. She tells me to jump, and I'll ask how high.
That doesn't mean I'm happy about not going to Maine though. I'm pretty disgusted with the weather. I was really looking forward to a few days with my best friend, Char. As much as I love hanging out with the other boys, there are just some things I can't talk to them about. Not anything major, just the "I'm a girl, and I want to whine about girly things for a few hours damn it!" *laughs*. I can't do that to the other boys... I'm pretty sure they wouldn't know how to respond even if I did.
I was still dwelling on my disappointment of my weekend going to shambles, when I went into to work to get my paycheck. As luck would have it, the kid who was supposed to be delivering during the day called out sick... Just my luck. Not only do I get screwed by the weather, but now I've ended up being begged by my boss to work the day delivery shift. I'm not very good with telling people "No", plus I'm always broke and in need of money, so I ended up working (out of uniform) for a few hours.
Now this is the part where I feel like God set me up. At the end of my shift, when we figured out how much money I owed from deliveries, the money I had left over in tips... was $23.... You have got to be kidding me.
(Note: If you don't know about our obsession with The Number 23, read this blog post: http://myjerseyboys.blogspot.com/2011/01/number-23.html)
I'm pretty sure God is laughing his ass off at me saying, "Oh, B. Hey, uh... I know you thought your weekend was going to go like this, but... I'm gonna fuck that all up for ya! Happy April Fools!"....
Not cool... Well, until next time!
Peace & Cigarettes,
(not to be confused with Char's "Peace & Funk" *winks*)
B
B here, with another story of my misfortunes. Maybe not misfortunes, just a pain in my ass really. You see, whenever I make plans, even if they are well thought out and I've had time to schedule everything, something always goes wrong. I don't mean little things either. I mean, here's my plan and now it's ruined, kind of wrong. For example, which is really the whole point of this tirade on my luck, this weekend I was supposed to go to Maine with Char and see a concert. God couldn't let me have one weekend outside of Jersey though...
The plan was that after I got out of my 8 A.M. class, I would go pick up my paycheck, get my oil changed and tires rotated, then make the drive up to Massachusetts. Char goes to school up there, so I was going to meet him and his awesome roommate, and drive up with them to Maine. Anticipating the long day ahead of me, I went to bed around ten last night... I then proceeded to wake up at five this morning. That was not part of the plan. Seven o'clock would have been an acceptable time, but five? My family of early birds aren't even up at five. Needless to say, I was a little annoyed, so I plugged in my headphones and attempted to sleep for a little longer. Only to wake up again at six. At some point during my hour of restless sleep, my headphones had fallen out of my ears, and some obnoxious freakin bird was practically screaming outside my window. I personally hate the sound of birds in the morning. What is so damn important that they feel the need to chirp loud enough for everyone to hear at six in the morning? Seriously? Can't that wait until ten or something when I've had a cup of coffee? I don't normal condone violence against innocent animals, but this bird was lucky I couldn't get my window open. I was about ready to go Xena: The Warrior Princess on it's ass with my slingshot... Yes, I own a slingshot... I like shooting grapes at people, don't you judge me. Actually, this time I wouldn't really blame you if you did judge me. I'm pretty sure my industrial sized slingshot isn't legal in the state of New Jersey. I guess we can add that to the list of things I own or do that is illegal, and I just don't care.
Anyway, I went back to sleep for an hour, then got up and got ready for class. I should mention real quick that I live with my two grandparents and my Aunt, because otherwise this next part of the story might not make any sense. As I was walking out of my house, I said a quick goodbye to my Aunt and Grandma, telling them that if I didn't see them after class, I would see them when I came home on Sunday. My Grandma briefly mentioned the northeast having a little bit of snow, so I responded saying I would check with Char and see how the roads are...
Two hours later, I'm sitting in my public speaking class, and my phone starts blowing up. Not literally blowing up, that would be horrible. I just mean that I received a lot of texts all at once.... God help me for teaching my Grandmother how to text... I got a four page long text about how the damn Weather Channel was reporting a "MASSIVE" snowstorm in the northeast last night... So I texted Char's roommate and asked her what the weather status was. Her response, "It snowed two inches and was done." Here's the thing about having an Italian Grandmother though, once she's decided it's not safe, there's no arguing with her. Trust me, I've tried previously and have failed. Every. Freaking. Time. You would think I would win just ONCE. Nope, not a chance. I respect my Grandmother though, she's always been there for me, especially when I've needed it most. So when it comes down to it, I'll do whatever will make her happy. She tells me to jump, and I'll ask how high.
That doesn't mean I'm happy about not going to Maine though. I'm pretty disgusted with the weather. I was really looking forward to a few days with my best friend, Char. As much as I love hanging out with the other boys, there are just some things I can't talk to them about. Not anything major, just the "I'm a girl, and I want to whine about girly things for a few hours damn it!" *laughs*. I can't do that to the other boys... I'm pretty sure they wouldn't know how to respond even if I did.
I was still dwelling on my disappointment of my weekend going to shambles, when I went into to work to get my paycheck. As luck would have it, the kid who was supposed to be delivering during the day called out sick... Just my luck. Not only do I get screwed by the weather, but now I've ended up being begged by my boss to work the day delivery shift. I'm not very good with telling people "No", plus I'm always broke and in need of money, so I ended up working (out of uniform) for a few hours.
Now this is the part where I feel like God set me up. At the end of my shift, when we figured out how much money I owed from deliveries, the money I had left over in tips... was $23.... You have got to be kidding me.
(Note: If you don't know about our obsession with The Number 23, read this blog post: http://myjerseyboys.blogspot.com/2011/01/number-23.html)
I'm pretty sure God is laughing his ass off at me saying, "Oh, B. Hey, uh... I know you thought your weekend was going to go like this, but... I'm gonna fuck that all up for ya! Happy April Fools!"....
Not cool... Well, until next time!
Peace & Cigarettes,
(not to be confused with Char's "Peace & Funk" *winks*)
B
|
